Saturday, June 16, 2012

Father's Day is Tomorrow...and There Will be NO Whining!

Father’s Day is tomorrow and there will be no whining.  Complaining is not allowed.  Pouting is forbidden. There will be no self centered negative emotions. Having a bad attitude is totally out of the question. I really should provide some form of an explanation…

My first Father’s Day without my dad was in 1978.  It occurred a few weeks after my 16th birthday.  It was a sad day indeed.  And even though I am blessed with three remarkable sons I still have a tendency to experience internal whining every year on Father’s Day.  But this year there will be no such grumbling. 

In April of this year, my childhood friend, Ray Christensen passed away.  He left two sons and a daughter behind.  (Actually he had two daughters. He viewed his daughter-in-law as being one of his own.)  Last Saturday another friend that grew up on the same road with Ray and me passed away after a battle with brain cancer.  Steve left an 18 year old son behind. 

Tomorrow they will experience what I did in 1978. Whining on my part is therefore inexcusable. There will be no time for carping or feeling sorry for myself. In addition to enjoying my family, my energies will be focused on Ray Jr, Cynthia, and Ashley.  I will additionally be thinking about Steve’s son, Ian. It will be a day of mixed emotions for all of them.  The truth is it will just be a difficult day.

Complaining will be eradicated permanently from my Father’s Day routine, because I firmly believe that loyalty in friendship should be extended from generation to generation.  I also believe that is a good reason to emerge from the depths of grief to serve others that are traveling a similar path.

As a 50 year old man, I still find that there are times I just long to have a conversation with my father.  That is not going to happen.  But I will not whine, because there are conversations I need to initiate with those that are feeling the same thing…Father’s Day is tomorrow and there will be no whining.